My friends! We’re back for another episode of the Raw report! Last week we saw the return of Bobby Lashley and the arrivals of No Way Jose and Authors of Pain. This week is the Superstar Shakeup!
Kurt Angle starts the show off coming down to the ring! He welcomes everyone and gets everyone amped up for tonight. Sunil Singh interrupts Kurt and introduces Jinder Mahal! He’s the first to make the jump! The crowd is a little less than excited. Jinder congratulates Kurt on picking him and says he’s secured RAWs position as the A show. He asks why he wasn’t in a Limo on his way to RAW. Kurt welcomes him and they go back and forth for a little bit. Jinder says he’s better than any superstar on Smackdown or Raw. He wants the same perks as Brock Lesnar. The crowd is fired up for sure. Kurt makes a match for right now! Jinder Mahal vs…. Jeff Hardy’s music hits!
Jinder Mahal vs. Jeff Hardy:
Jinder starts out with a big kick and starts laying into Hardy. Jeff gets a reversal and has taken control of the match. Jinder is knocked out of the ring. Jeff flies out and clobbers him. Jeff is jumping off things, hitting people, and the crowd is eating it up. Commercial time. Back from commercial we get Jinder in control, having Hardy in a hold on the mat. It gives Jeff time to rest and the crowd time to chant. Jinder holds control as he beats him down. Jeff makes a small come back but Jinder puts a stop to it. Jeff, on the top rope, ends up knocking Jinder away, allowing for a Whisper in the wind. Sunil goes to interfere but Jeff stops it, Jinder goes to attack but Jeff reverses and gets a good series in. Jeff went for the twist of fate but Jinder counters and goes for the pin. Jinder goes for the Kalaus (sp?) but Jeff rolls him up. Jinder kicks out and hits a big knee. Jeff hits a Twist of Fate, then a Swanton Bomb! Jeff Hardy is the new US Title Champion!
Winner: AND NEW UNITED STATES CHAMPION….JEFF HARDY
Jinder looks pissed after the match, as Jeff leaves. It was a okay match but fun to see Jeff win and hopefully can bring some momentum to the US title again.
Backstage Jinder and Sunil are walking around looking all mad. Sweetness, Renee Young, goes to interview and Jinder says he’s taking his rematch at GRR. No Way Jose is dancing right next to them and tells Jinder to smile. He invites Renee to a fiesta and they leave. Lucky Bastard.
Bayley is out to the ring next
Sasha Banks vs. Bayley:
They both argue for a second before Sasha starts with a kick to the stomach. Sasha hits Bayley with a big slap to the chest. Then some sort of weird corner moved turned into an awkward throw. Im not sure about that one. Sasha ends up outside the ring the Bayley dives out and hits a hurricanrana….Rey Mysterio nod anyone??! Anyone?? Okay just me.. Anyways, commercial time. Back from commercial and Sasha has Bayley in a rest hold. She breaks out and the pair clash, Bayley showing a more aggressive side, laying into Sasha. Bayley hits a second rope inverted DDT and goes for a pin but Sasha kicks. Sasha pokes Bayley in the eyes like a punk and now she has the advantage over Bayley. Sasha hits a pair of Meteoras and tries to pin but Bayley shows resilience and kicks out. Sasha starts talking trash to Bayley, saying shes better and hits a monster slap. The exchange slaps and let the fists fly! After a neat exchange Bayley is in the Banks statement. The Riott Squad comes in and beats Sasha down. Sarah Logan hits a nasty head butt, Liv Morgan does some sort of code breaker type thing on Sasha. Ruby Riott hits a Riott Kick on Bayley and the Riott Squad stands tall. Welcome to RAW ladies. Go out and get some.
Heath Slater and Rhyno vs. Authors of Pain:
Im going to pretend like I don’t know who will win and think Slater and Rhyno have a chance. Slater and Rhyno get the drop on AOP before the bell rings. Slater takes on Akam but quickly tags Rhyno who throws some hands, the Slater comes in and gets pummeled right away. AOP hits a double knee to the midsection on Slater but Heath gets away and tags in Rhyno. Rhyno runs the ring on the AOP but the numbers get to him and they hit the Last Chapter for the win.
Winner: Authors of Pain
Slater and Rhyno actually had great offense in this match but it wasn’t enough to stop the power of AOP.
Back in the ring, We have MIZ TV!
Miz talks about the debuts already, he welcomes his guests….Sami Zayn and Kevin Owens! Everyone is all smiles as the pair walks to the ring. Technically (Kayfabe) they down have a job but they’re here so whatever works. They all hug in the ring. The crowd chants Yes! Miz says standing before the crowd is the finest group of talent ever. Bigger than the NWO. More talent than the 92’ dream team. Better than the new Avengers. He says they’re changing the landscape of WWE. They call the shots, they have the control…Uncle Kurt comes out because he’s had enough of this nonsense. Kurt say the Miz has no control, and reminds everyone that Kami lost last week. Kevin says there is an email but plans have changed. Sami reads the email. Basically it says Kevin and Sami are on RAW, courtesy of Stephanie McMahon! Kevin and Sami mock Uncle Kurt. Miz joins in on the mocking and Kurt says whats done and done. He welcomes Sami and Kevin and bids farewell to the Miz! He’s headed to Smackdown! The Miz is livid. Kurt makes a match with Kevin, Sami, The Miztourage vs Finn, Seth, Braun, Bobby Lashley, and Mystery Partner! Maybe it’s a returning Wrestlemania sign!? Maybe its Kenny Omega?! Naw, its probably Drew McIntyre!
Matt and Bray appear on the screen and cut a weird promo.
The Revival vs. Bray Wyatt and Matt Hardy:
Matt and Dawson start things out. Wilder tags in but gets his face slammed into the ring pads for his troubles. Matt tags in Bray. Bray plays mind games with Wilder before laying him out. Matt and Bray hit a good double team and the Revival rolls out of the ring. Matt and Bray say wonderful together and the crowd loves it. Back in the ring, the Revival finally start to get some good offense. Dawson lays into Matt Hardy. Dawson lures Bray into the ring but nothing really really comes of it. Matt ends up hitting a Side Effect and gets the tag on Bray. He beats the hell out of Wilder, then clocks Dawson with a mean looking right. Matt tags himself in and They hit an assited Twist of Fate on Wilder.
Winner: “Woken” Matt Hardy and Bray Wyatt
Cesaro and Sheamus are backstage, talking, when the Fashion Police show up! New Fashion Files?! They roast how Cesaro and Sheamus are dressed. They give them a ticket and walk away. Raw is killing it so far.
They recap the RAW from last week and the returns it brought. They also show what happened last week between Stephanie McMahon and Ronda Rousey.
Uncle Kurt and Ronda are backstage talking. In walks Natalya! YESSSSSSS.
Ember Moon vs. Mickie James
Nia is at the announce table. Mickie get a quick grapple but Ember takes over quickly, showing off her fast and strong offense. Mickie comes back quickly and the two exchange blows. Mickie shows off her skills as the crafty veteran. Alexa is interviewed by Michael Cole while she’s backstage…womp womp. She keeps calling Nia a bully and looks extra sad. In the ring, Mickie is still in control but Moon is making a slow but steady comeback. She finishes the match with an Eclipse that was naaaaasty. Mickie James is dead.
Winner: Ember Moon
Kevin and Sami are backstage arguing about the match tonight. Miz pops in to ask what Shane McMahon is like these days
Enter Dolph Ziggler! Newest member of RAW to mild fanfare. He walks to the ring with some things to say. He cuts a good DZ type promo about being the best but out comes Titus WorldWide! They welcome him back to Monday Night Raw! Titus tries to recruit Dolph to TWW. He says thank you for interrupting him and that he didn’t come back to raw alone. Out comes Drew McIntyre! They proceed to beat the hell out of TWW. The crowd chants Holy Shit! McIntyre beats down Apollo as the crowd chants for McIntyre. Drew is looking killer and he’s back baby!
Next we have the Big Dog, Roman Reigns, chain and all! Roman gets less than the regular amount of boos today. He says he’s here (lol, we see that Roman) and Brock Lesnar isn’t. He talks about his match in Saudi Arabia. He says he’ll win and be our Full time Universal Champion. He starts to say something but Samoa Joe walks out, looking mean as hell and ready to fight. If there is one person that im glad is back, its Samoa freakin Joe. He says Roman like to brag about coming to work but doesn’t brag about getting the job done. OHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! Joe says Roman never will. He says he’s not getting in the ring with a regular superstar, he’s getting in the ring with the Beast! He says he doesn’t feel sorry for him because he doesn’t realize his place because he keeps getting beat down. Joe is bearing sweet mercy by putting the Big Dog to sleep, once and for all. Joe intros a video package of Roman getting his ass whooped by Brock Lesnar in variation occasions. Roman has a smirk on his face, along with Joe. Roman challenges Joe and calls him a fatass. Be a Star Roman. Not cool. Joe acts like he’s going to but he remembers that he’s the bigger man and walks away, though he looks angry. He stops and decides to go get some. He gets to the ring and turns around again, swerving everyone in the arena. Good move Joe.
The remainder of Absolution come out to the ring.
Mandy Rose (with Sonya Deville) vs. Natalya
Nattie goes for a quick roll up. Mandy doesn’t like this and slaps Natalya. Nattie takes acception to this and beats the hell out of Mandy Rose. Mandy gets the upperhand outside the ring and takes the action back to the mat. Mandy is in control, putting a boot to Nattie’s neck. Mandy continues her control with an abdominal stretch in the middle of the ring. Nattie comes back and puts Mandy in the Sharpshooter. Mandy taps!
Nattie gets a beat down afterwards and Ronda Rousey comes down to the ring for the save. Deville gets in the ring. Two MMA stars in the ring. Ronda takes her down quickly and Absolution 2.0 scurries off.
Baron Corbin video package. Guess he’s coming to RAW now. Good for him.
Fashion Police vs. The Bar
Cesaro and Fandango are in first. Fandango puts on Cesaro’s jacket. Cesaro’s gets control early but Breeze eventually gets the tag in. Cesaro clobbers Tyler, then rips off his shirt. Not very nice. Sheamus tags in and goes to town. The Bar hits their double team superkick in the corner and Cesaro is back in with Breeze in a rest hold. Sheamus tags in again. Tyler is taking a beating as Sheamus is talking trash to Fandango on the apron. Sheamus clears Fandango off the apron, The Bar hits another double team move, and Tyler kicks! Tyler gets a roll up pin after Fandango knocks Sheamus off the apron!
Winner: Fashion Police
Backstage is Renee Young with Elias. He isn’t playing tonight. Elias doesn’t do small time and Hartford, CT is a small town apparently. Too small for Elias. He says Lashley doesn’t matter anymore. Elias says he’s the biggest star in the WWE, not Lashley. He says if Lashley interrupts him again, he’ll learn that WWE stands for WALK WITH ELIAS. He says he’ll play a song for
Sweet, Sweet Renee. Elias doesn’t care one bit but Elias goes on.
The Miztourage/Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens vs. Seth Rollins/Finn Balor/Bobby Lashley/Braun Strowman/???:
*Im covering big spots and important parts. Play by play is too crazy for 10 man insanity*
*Corey Graves said Bullet Club on RAW. #mentionmesoftlybrother*
The mystery partner is Bobby Roode?! Wow. Surprising but im down! Michael Cole is losing his mind over him being on RAW.
The heel team gets beat down for the most part with the exception on Finn getting controlled for a while. Lashley shows off his awesome strength, tossing Miz outside of the ring. We have another commercial, 5 minutes before RAW goes off the air. I don't understand this. Back from commercial and Seth is being beat down KO. For as many people as are in this match, its relatively tame. They have some chaos going on outside of the ring but inside its nothing to write home about. I do enjoy seeing the teamwork between Axel and Dallas. Those two could be a legit tag team down the road. Braun comes in the ring and starts murdering everyone. I'm waiting for Nicholas to come out but it doesn't happen. Braun is so over it is ridiculous. Towards the end of the match everyone seems to hit their spots, trading moves. Miz and Braun end up alone in the ring. Miz hits corner drop kicks... a'la Daniel Bryan but Braun has one of his own. T-Rex dropkick according to Graves. Axel and Dallas turn on Miz! They leave him to Braun. RIP.
Winners: All the Faces
RAW was entertaining for sure. Lots of trades and call ups. Drew McIntyre and KO/Sami are probably the best acquisitions. Look for more trades tomorrow on Smackdown!
That's all we have for tonight! Check us out tomorrow for a Smackdown Live! Review and more snarky comments from me. Follow me @buuurch1 on the twitter, check out more awesome content on the site, and as always, TAKE CARE!